One year.

गायत्री

Dear Manju,

Happy Anniversary Sweetheart!!!

A year ago today I did not know one day on the calendar I’d feel even more warmer than the rest 364. This day feels like a tiny lit window (cause you’re tiny) but very very warm. Everytime I’ve said ‘Happy - months Manjuuu’ I’ve felt warm & to see that transition into an year feels like - idk I am on top of the fucking world. It’s the best feeling in the world for me.

I am really grateful to my Gayatri that you are a part of my life. Your presence makes the present worth staying.

I’ve started noticing myself becoming more brave, a little more soft and becoming someone I like more.

Over the past year Manju, I was quiet distracted, days where I was too much in my own head (A little pain in the ass), days where I wasn’t able to treat you well but you being the Manju you are made me feel like I am worth more. I’ve seen myself be a bit more patient with myself & that I believe is because you are patient with me. I still believe my girlfriend is a lil cuckoo cause she holds up with my nonsense - my insane mood swings, my emotional irrationality. I am sorry I make you go through these, I really am, I am still working on it sweetie. I really hope you know that you deserve more Manju ma.

Thank you Manju, for being patient with me, for being soft with me, for reasoning with me, for hearing what I mean even when I say it badly, for being calm I did not know I was looking for, for believing in me on the days I did not, for being my favourite person to tell things to first, for making the distance feel smaller than it is, for your stubbornness which makes me and you never give up on us, for letting me see the parts of you you don’t show to others and so many more I cannot fit on this paper. Thank you for this year & making me greedy for all the ones to come.

I don’t know where exactly life is going to drag either of us, but I do know one thing for sure I want you in all of it. The good ones the tired ones, the big plans, the boring tuesdays. I want you, you & only you Manjushree from IMT.

There might be things you might not like me doing, like you might not like me putting the milk in the last cabinet, you might like it on the side. You’re worth all of my time, keeping all the points we speak about & prioritise. I genuinely want to ask you that if at any point going forward in our relationship keeping communication & acceptance as our fore-fronts if I ever forget do remind me & if you forget I will remind you. I know it’s not all roses & petals there’s also thorns, fuck all of the thorns after all the thinking, brainstorming & ruining your mood over this I still choose you to be the person who has influence over me, the person whom I can be vulnerable to & spend all the time I have cause I choose you & only you. ‘And as I am burning into ashes near the ganges & when my heart starts to burn all they will smell is you, My Manju’. Would you want to be my Girlfriend?

Love Always,
Devashish :)